


What to do about Roger

by ladyinpink602 (leodis57)



Category: Tennis RPF
Genre: Comedy, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-14
Updated: 2014-03-14
Packaged: 2018-01-15 16:50:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,050
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1312141
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/leodis57/pseuds/ladyinpink602
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Before the Indian Wells tournament Novak decides to call a top players’ conference to discuss what to do about Roger.</p>
            </blockquote>





	What to do about Roger

**Author's Note:**

> This is just my imagination running wild. Nothing like this ever happened or ever will happen. No disrespect intended.

“Hi Andy, thanks for coming” said Novak as he held open the door to his top floor suite at the plush Indian Wells hotel where he was staying.

Andy walked in and looked around to see if anyone else was present.

“Take a seat,” said Novak gesturing to one of the large purple leather chairs in front of the full length window.

“Don’t mind if I do,” answered Andy, throwing himself down with a thud, his long denim clad legs sprawled out in front of him. “What’s all this about, Nole?”

“Drink?” asked Novak going over to the mini bar.

“Er, just water thanks. So, what’s all this about then? You made it sound very mysterious on the phone.”

Novak handed him a water and picked up an orange juice for himself. He sat down in a neighbouring chair and took a large gulp.

“Well …. It’s a bit tricky, but I’ve asked a few of the guys here to discuss Roger and what to do about him.”

Andy sat up. “Roger? What do you mean? Who’ve you asked?” He looked surprised.

“Relax OK, I’m not suggesting hiring a hit man or anything that.” Novak said laughingly. “Although maybe that’s not a bad idea!”

“Nole …”

“Look, you know what happened at Dubai. He managed to take out both me and Tomas. I mean, a resurgent Federer is a dangerous beast.”

Andy nodded. “Well, you’ve got something there Nole. He beat me in the quarters at the Aussie Open – didn’t expect that.”

“Yeah, so I thought why don’t a few of us top guys get together and agree a strategy.” Novak was clearly pleased with himself for having thought of this.

“So, go on, tell me who you’ve asked and I’ll tell you if it’s a good idea or not.” Andy smiled as he said this.

Novak put his drink down and looked at his hands. “Well, Tomas for a start – I know he’s concerned like we are.” He looked sideways at Andy and satisfied himself that this met with the other’s approval.

“Then there’s Juan Martin …”

Andy pulled a face.  

“and Rafa.”

“Rafa! To quote John McEnroe ‘you cannot be serious’” spluttered Andy, spraying water in all directions.

Novak patted his knee. “There’s method in my madness” he said reassuringly.

“I hope you haven’t asked Stan. That would be so NOT a good idea!”

“No way have I asked him. Don’t want any Swiss loyalties manifesting themselves.”

“Thank God but … Rafa ….” Andy shook his head.

They were interrupted by a knock on the door. Novak got up to answer it and ushered in Tomas Berdych and Juan Martin del Potro.

“Hi guys” said Tomas cheerfully “Juan Martin joined me in the elevator and I gathered he was heading in the same direction as me.” He perched himself on the arm of Andy’s chair.

Juan Martin looked uncomfortable as he stood in the middle of the room, his large frame taking up a good deal of space.

“Sit down, man” said Novak. “You’re intimidating me standing there like that.” He pushed Juan Martin into the chair that he’d recently vacated.

There was an uneasy silence as Andy Juan Martin studiously avoided meeting each other’s gaze.

Novak clapped his hands to break the tension. “Well, isn’t this nice! Only Rafa still to come.”

“Late as ever” smirked Andy.

A minute or two later there was another rap at the door. “Speak of the devil” muttered Novak as he got up to let Rafa in.

Dressed in shorts and a T shirt Rafa had come straight from practice; he dropped his bags on the floor. He looked taken aback as he took in the assembled group.

“This is some type of players’ meeting, no?” he asked Novak. “I was not expecting to see everyone here.“

“No it’s more of an informal get-together, Rafa, to discuss something that affects us all.”

“Well, you tell me it is important so here I am.”

Novak grabbed another chair for Rafa and sat on one of the arms. He cleared his throat. “So, guys, it’s like this. We’re over two months into the tour and we’ve got a problem. Namely a ‘come back’ Roger. I think you guys will agree me with me that we have to do something.” He looked from one to another, trying to gauge reactions.

Andy and Tomas nodded in agreement. “Yeah, you’re right about the problem Nole but unless you’re advocating some sort of ‘accident’ I don’t think there’s much we can do about it” replied Andy.

“To be honest, I think so too” added Tomas. “And anyway if Roger fell from a top floor window, he would get up straight away and be fine.”

An expression of horror crossed Rafa’s face. “I do not like this. Why do you have a problem with Roger?”

“I thought it was a mistake to involve him” said Andy in a low voice, looking at Novak.

“Can I say that I do not have a problem with Roger. He has always been a good friend.”

Novak clapped Juan Martin on the shoulder. “Yeah but, with due respect, you need to put friendship on one side. The guy coming back like this is a threat to us all.”

“I think like Juan Martin. Roger is not a problem to _me_ ” replied Rafa pointedly emphasising ‘me’.

“But you need to see the bigger picture” said Novak with an air of exasperation. “Last year we thought he was on his way out didn’t we? We thought he was going to go quietly and slide away into history – it was all going so well I thought, soon there’ll be no Roger Federer on the tour. But what happens then? He’s suddenly back with us again, winning matches and getting in the way.” He shook his head at this annoying turn of events.

“Yeah Rafa, you’ve got to see the bigger picture here” repeated Andy.

Rafa frowned. “So, what are you suggesting?”

“Well, as Andy and Tomas said, I don’t think an accident would work. We need to come up with another plan.”

“Have you got something in mind, Nole?” asked Tomas.

“I think …” said Novak as the four men watched his face expectantly. “We need to persuade Roger to retire, like now, this year.”

Andy and Tomas both burst out laughing. “So, how do you intend arranging that?” asked Andy.

“He’s got a kid on the way, hasn’t he? We need someone – someone he trusts – to persuade him he’ll better off retiring so he can spend time with his family.”

“Oh well, that rules me out” said Tomas.

“Me too” said Andy “And he won’t listen to you, Nole.”

“I am leaving. I will have no part in this” responded Juan Martin, getting up and slamming the door behind him as he left.

“We’re better off without him” shrugged Andy. “He wouldn’t have cooperated anyway.”

All eyes now turned to Rafa who jumped up in alarm. “You think I will do this? You are mad, all of you.   Rogelio – Roger is the greatest in history – he wants to stay on the Tour, so he stays!”

The other three swapped glances at this. “Yeah, yeah ‘greatest in history’” said Tomas with a short laugh.

“It is true!” shouted Rafa who was now pacing up and down the room getting more agitated by the minute.

“But Rafa, think about it” said Novak putting his hands on Rafa’s shoulders.

“Roger likes you, he’ll listen to what you say.”

“What I think is this, you will have to find someone else to do your – how do you say – ‘dirty work’.”

“Come on Rafa, you’re the only one who stands a chance of persuading him” answered Andy in his most cajoling voice.

“Andy I am surprised at you for supporting this. I think I should leave too and not listen to any more” admonished Rafa as he went over to his bags and began to haul one on each shoulder.

*

As Rafa made to leave he almost collided with Roger who was in the process of knocking on the door. He didn’t know which of the two of them was more surprised.

“Hey Rafa” said Roger laughing as he placed a steadying hand on Rafa’s chest, “Are you leaving as I am just arriving? Man, that’s bad timing.”

“Roger! What …. Why you here?” Rafa’s expression resembled that of a goldfish and his English was starting to desert him.

“Well, I bumped into Juan Martin in the lobby and he told me you guys were having a little get-together here so I thought I’d come along and join you.” The silence with which he was greeted was deafening. Roger strolled into the room and beamed at his dumbfounded colleagues.

Novak was the first to recover his composure. He walked over to Roger and shook his hand. “Welcome, Roger, it’s good to see you. Er, sorry you didn’t get an invite but it was a sort of spur of the moment gathering.” He laughed to cover his nervousness.

“Oh sure, not to worry, I thought there must have been some sort of oversight.”

“Sit down Roger” said Novak gesturing to the chair recently vacated by Juan Martin. “Let me get you a drink”.   “Fuck, fuck” he said under his breath as he walked towards the mini bar. “I’ll kill Juan Martin.”

“So, what’s the occasion?” asked Roger, one leg casually draped across the other. Novak watched him out of the corner of his as he busied himself with drinks. As usual, Roger was looking the picture of Swiss elegance; why did he find that so damned annoying?

Tomas coughed and looked at Andy. His face was as red as his shirt. Andy looked helplessly over at Novak and then at the floor.

“Er, well ….. it’s a sort of, sort of …..”

“Surprise!” put in Tomas.

“Yes, that’s it. A surprise.”

Rafa was by now standing behind Roger’s chair and glaring at Andy.

“A surprise?” Roger lifted an eyebrow.

“Yeah” said Novak coming back with drinks and thinking on his feet. “I’m afraid you’ve found us out, Roger. We were planning a surprise party for you weren’t we guys?”

Andy and Tomas were simultaneously struck down with choking fits.

“A surprise party for me?” said Roger looking up and smiling with warmth at Rafa. “Guys, I don’t know what to say.”

Rafa blushed furiously. The twinkle in Roger’s eyes made him wonder just what it was that Juan Martin had told him.

“But wait.” Roger added. “Where is Stan? Is he not included in the planning?”

“Stan” answered Novak scratching his head. “Stan, yeah. Who was going to invite Stan, guys?” His eyes flickered around the room.

“Oh I think it was Juan Martin” replied Tomas. “Didn’t he go to get him?”

“That’s it” said Andy. “He’s probably on his way.”

“Well, this is nice I must say” remarked Roger with a broad smile. “All you guys getting together to plan a surprise party for me. I’m honoured. What have I done to deserve it?”

There was an awkward silence before Novak spoke.

“Does there have to be a reason? We just wanted to celebrate your return to form you know, after last year.” He fervently hoped he was as convincing at telling lies as he was at playing tennis.

“Nole was just saying what a great player you are” said Rafa fixing Novak with a piercing stare. “He agrees with me – you are the best in history.”

“Er, yes, of course Roger.” Novak smiled but his smile didn’t reach his eyes.

“Aww thanks Novak. Didn’t realise you were such a fan.”

Novak laughed and threw Rafa a filthy look.

“You know I think I’m going to leave you guys to get on with the planning” said Roger. “Rafa, the twins have been dying to see you. Do you want to join me?”

Rafa grinned. “Si, Rogie. I would like to come with you very much.”

After they left, Novak turned to the others and breathed a sigh of relief. “I think we got out of that one OK” he said scratching his head. “So, who wants to arrange this damned party then?”

“Your idea Nole. We’ll let you take the lead” replied Andy, smirking.

Novak made a mental note to keep any future bright ideas for himself.

 

END

 

 

 

 

 

 


End file.
